With time, you learn how to cry without making a sound
How to force your sclera to go from red to white in a millisecond.
A little less on the outside and a little more within
My mind seems to wander into places I have never been.
There’s really nothing, not even mere chemistry
My lips are curved upwards in a crescent shape.
My soul often pours out with unexplained misery
I want to run but, I cannot escape.
I miss so many things, so many people
It doesn’t make sense, at least not from this angle.
Most of all, I miss the one thing I never had
I miss you, my beautiful sexy lad.
The electric impulses that are fired when we touch
It feels so unreal; I never thought I’d ever experienced such.
The constant churning in my belly when we kiss
If we never become, this is something I’ll definitely miss.
The way my heart skips a few beats when you walk by
I want to reach out and hold you but, I can’t even manage to say “Hi”.
You’re right here but you’re not
It’s like we progress only to regress once more.
Something like a swing, we keep going back and forth
Playing with my emotions? I hope not.
I’m too feeble, too weak to explain
Unsure if I can cope with the pain.
Now and again I go on my knees and pray
That eventually, these superficial feelings will go away.