The tears puddle up in both my eyes
A blink away from dropping
But I can’t let that happen
I can’t let them see it
I can’t let them know
That the joy in me was all a big show
So I’m shutting my eyes a bit tighter
C’mon baby girl, you’ve always been quite the fighter
I is strong
I may be unwanted, mistreated, unappreciated, hated, tormented,
But I is strong
And that’s all that I have
All that I need to hold back the condensed form of depression momentarily pricking my eyes
Blurring my vision
Influencing my thoughts
Doubting my ability to stay focused
But they’ve got the wrong girl
The wrong girl is who they have got
I will not be like the others
Lock myself up and cry my life away
They fool themselves thinking that crying takes away the pain
Makes you feel better
I’ve been fooled once but, never again
Hold on young one, you’re going to make it through yet another day
I Swear I Won’t Cry
So, I’m still shutting my eyes tightly
Forcing my thoughts to become happy ones
Forcing my breathing to become normal and my jaw to stop vibrating
I’m forcing it all
Holding back the pain, hurt, misery, depression
Holding back the temptation to entertain my desolate and bereft feeling
Holding back my tears
Because if I don’t…
If I don’t fight as hard as I do
I might let a teardrop fall
And then another
And then a few more
Only a matter of seconds until my eyes mimic the nature of a waterfall
A matter of seconds until the tears come flooding out
Never ending and ever pouring
It’s the buildup of misery over the past years
Misery I hadn’t let anyone else see
Misery I had locked up in an old chest and thrown away the key
The misery behind my influential smile and contagious laugh
Like pure water flows out of the spring rocks
So will my tears flow
Unwanted and unstoppable they will be
Full of all the negative emotions they will be
Embarrassing they will be
Despite the fact that I am hiding behind closed doors
And not a soul in the world can see me in my fragile, emotional state
I will be abashed to know that I didn’t fight back hard enough
I will feel weak and helpless
Destroyed and hopeless
Because I was once a strong woman
And a fighter of emotions
Letting a tear escape from my tear glands and onto my cheek
Does nothing but prove that I have given in to emotional pain
And lost the title of a strong woman
But a strong woman is who I want to be
Who I have always been
So, a strong woman, I will continue to be
I Swear I Won’t Cry
Love,
A
x
This is just amazing tbh.
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Thank youuu
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Nice 🙂
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Thank you 🙂
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