A. – Page 16 – Akunna Ezekwem

July 25, 2015January 23, 2018

The Voyage Into The Uncharted.

Hey lovies,

There are two things I find more amazing that finding out someone has accidentally deposited money that I didn’t deserve into my account.

1) Realising that one of your really close friends has a hidden talent

2) Acting like my blog is famous enough to ‘feature’ other people’s poetry/prose

Today must be my lucky day because those two things just happened. Below is..uhm..let’s just call him Loloski. Below is Loloski’s piece and I absolutely fell in love with the art of writing all over again.

…….

The Voyage Into The Uncharted.

Would be a lie if I say I haven’t been drawn to anyone the way I am to you

However it’s the manner in which I am drawn to you that is most puzzling

Never has it seemed that I’m utterly wasting my time waging this voyage into an abyss of which I know not what lies ahead , but I am determined to foster on because I believe the treasures that lie beyond this bulletproof darkness that lines my eyesight , would grossly outweigh any effort I have put in thus far

Some might call it curiosity. Some might call it stupidity. I call it the need to know.
As I embark on this journey to know you , after struggling and overcoming the turbulent waves of shyness that prohibited my departure initially. I am confronted with yet another bout of gale force winds that threatens to leave me buried amongst the jagged rocks that line this narrow path I take on the route to know you

With every stroke I take forward , these waves and winds take me back so much I begin to question if I am making progress. I’m at the border where I don’t know if this disinterest you radiate is actually real or if it’s a shroud in which you hide your own shyness and insecurities.

As everything about you is a mystery I am tempted to go with the latter and soldier on this voyage. I have come too far to give up and I shall still soldier on. And as you watch and throw me more challenges you shall be impressed by the sincerity of my voyage that I am coming to you , not to take the riches you have , but to even cultivate and multiply and give you a company worthy to share the blessings nature has ladened you with.

I know not where I am going. Neither do I have a map or compass or any directional help from you. But I do believe that I’m on the right path , and someday , maybe not soon , I would get through to you.

M1Ö.

July 8, 2015January 23, 2018

Realisations.

I have fast realised that everything begins with an adventure
A pinch of fear,
A rush of adrenaline
The burning desire to explore.

I have fast realised that life is about progression
From one extreme situation to another
It’s hard to decide what is worse
Either getting burned by ice burgs
Or being forced to swim through the Great Lake of fire.

I have fast realised that my line of thoughts stay constantly intertwined
Would this be long lasting or would things change once we’re all grown
While searching my heart, there was only one fact to find
I truly was happier when I was on my own.

Love,
A
x

July 6, 2015January 23, 2018

Young Poets.

Young poets,
It’s funny how you start off with butterflies in your bellies and love notes
Be it the girl that tickles your fancy in maths class
Or that guy you’re in love with but, barely know

Young poets,
It hurts me to see you graduate into writing about heartbreaks and sorrows
To feel your hearts beat so weak, they sound like echoes
Because your one true happiness is now the demon that lingers

Young poets,
I am proud to have seen you develop
From insignificant feelings, to pain, to something a lot more abrupt
I can feel it in your choice of words and attempt to come off as strong
I only hope that from now on, you are fully aware of your self worth

Love,

July 3, 2015January 23, 2018

Time Bomb.

One second
Two seconds
Three seconds,

Pause!

It’s the fifth second
Now the sixth second
At the seventh second,

Could you please just stop?!

My heart will stop at the eighth second
I beg you, please, don’t let it get to the ninth second
Because this time bomb is set to go off on the tenth second

And I’m afraid I will never be able to recover at all

Love,
A
x

June 28, 2015January 23, 2018

Hey Lovies.

Hey lovies,

Have I ever said how I think it’s so funny how life turns out? No? Well, I think it’s so funny how life turns out. Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, I feel the need to explain myself just so it doesn’t look like a totally unrelated way to start this post.

Two weeks ago was the absolute worst for me. I mean, if you ever see three posts in a week, that means there is three times as much anger in my soul than I should ideally harbour. I have never in my life felt so much pain, anger, confusion and ultimately, regret. It really does bother me that I’ve been throwing about this regret word lately but hopefully it ends here. Now the funny part is in the midst of all this negativity, I got so many views, it was unreal. I’m really grateful for that. I’m also so excited about my 100 posts mark and even though that has passed, I’ll put a little collage of the unfinished piece I meant to post down below.

So, we’ve established that your worst week would simultaneously be your best week. What next? Well, I learnt three things that week that I would always carry around with me.

1) Forgiveness is for myself.

I’m pretty sure you’ve heard this so many times. I had too but I never really thought much about it. It’s easy to forgive someone who bites your pen cover or forgets to shut the fridge properly or spreads false information about you. All these things seem petty and irrelevant but it’s the petty things that annoy us the most because c’mon, they really didn’t have to. Now, it’s a completely different level of forgiveness when it involves somebody who wants you to trust them but continuously betrays you, each time a bit worse than the previous. That, I couldn’t do.
For a long time I nurtured hate inside of me. If you’re anything like me, you never forget. So, every conversation, every text, every body language and every side comment would remain in my head just waiting for the right time to use my ammunition. But the truth is at the end of the day, I’ll be the only angry person. The only person with a burden to carry. Only my heart would beat fast while hatred would gradually rise to an abominable level but worst of all, it is only my prayers that wouldn’t be answered. I mean why would God forgive me when I cannot forgive another man 70×7 times?
I used to think forgiveness was synonymous to weakness until I heard someone say ‘I will forgive you but you will never be able to do the same thing to me twice’ then I thought woah. Ultimately, we’re required to forgive and forget and that’s exactly what I have decided to practise. I’ll forgive your offences as quick as you offend me and forget your shortcomings right before I forget your spot in my life.

2) Positivity is everything.

I wish I could explain this but I can’t. Right before my worst week’s incident, I felt such a huge wave of positivity in my spirit, nothing could bother me. It didn’t matter how big or small the problem was, my optimism could conquer it. I’m so happy I’ve found a way to revert back to a few weeks ago. I cannot imagine walking through life with so much negativity for the next few decades. Sometimes I sit and smile because I don’t think anyone else understands how ultimately blessed and at peace I feel.
I’m just going to drop a bible verse because I can’t explain further (Philippians 4:7)

3) This too shall pass 💜

Anyway, this isn’t a major point but I took a week away from all the negativity and decided to get a new identity. So, below is Ariana Walters. She’s a young lady who lives in Newyork and is currently working on putting together a portfolio in order to break into the modelling career. Now, Ariana is quite lucky because she shares a flat with her support system who doubles up as the love of her life and he’s always there 100% of the way. Wow that was really easy..

Life is beautiful

Love,

June 16, 2015January 23, 2018

You Too.

Open your palms out wide
And lay out a lending hand
Keep those greedy thoughts to the side
Because you too were once blessed.

Make a home in your heart for the Angels you meet
Pour some wine, set the table
Be swift to stop them from bowing at your feet
Because you too were once sheltered.

Limit not the extent of forgiveness
The world is cruel and the heart of man, wicked
But, understand that forgiving shows strength not weakness
Because you too were once a sinner.

Open your homes with joy in your hearts
Offering nothing but comforting words and acceptance
Welcome friendship and love and not just mere acquaintance
Because you too were once strangers.

With love, guide the easily strayed
Walk them through the right path
And remember to pray for grace
Because you too were once lost.

Love,
A
x

June 14, 2015January 23, 2018

Since You Know Me Best.

The worst thing in life is when you wake up in the morning with tears in your eyes and not a word of the Lord on your tongue

As my pillow soaks and my memory starts flooding back, I cannot help but think my problems are bigger than the one who saved me

While every inch of my body; head, belly, heart and my soul ache
Remind me again why these demons have finally had their way. I rebuked them for Christ sake

I grew up with phrases like
‘You reap what you sow’

But somehow, I reap bitterness and disgrace. Betrayal and the very opposite of compassion

The very opposite of what I envisioned

And I cannot forget. Cannot move on. Cannot help but regret

Every step every move

Every challenge I decided to take on because I thought I understood

The way of life and the balance of good and evil

Do onto others what you want others to do onto you

As simple as it sounds, the practicality of it is untrue

So while I break down and you do nothing but observe

I’d only ask one thing

You’re the one who knows me best so tell me what I deserve

Love doesn’t live here,
A.

June 4, 2015January 23, 2018

Can You Tell?

Can you tell that I’m lost?
Wandering through life blindly
With nothing leading me but my distrust.

Can you tell that I’m enclosed?
Sealed within my own misfortune
Is it obvious that I’ve had my optimism folded up and enveloped?

Can you tell that I’m hurt?
If you looked into my eyes, would you see where it burns?
Because I can’t prove it, not while my emotions remain inert.

Love doesn’t live here,

June 2, 2015January 23, 2018

One Hunnid.

Hey lovies,So I just hit 100 posts and normally I’d be a lot more excited. I mean, I am happy..overjoyed even but, at this point in my life, I can’t even manage to fake a smile. It hurts because that’s the one thing I could always do to just get through the day.

Today’s my hundredth post and I can’t help but count the last hundred tear drops that sank in to my pillow in the past few hours

A hundred posts and just about 100 throbs away from a migraine

A hundred posts but all I see is a hundred reasons to flee from negativity

A hundred reasons to run

Looking back at my hundred posts, I get to revisit my hundred past mistakes but it’s a shame I’m still living in one

A hundred posts? More like a hundred days of fasting and prayer just hoping that I recover

It’s my hundredth post everybody..a hundred weeks from what I thought was an amazing day in my life. Times like this, it’s hard to tell myself I deserve better

P.s be sure to know who to trust, respect, be there for and make yourself available to. So many people are undeserving and would love to take advantage.

Love doesn’t live here,
A.

June 2, 2015January 23, 2018

Ever..?

Ever wondered why ‘yes’ is ‘no’ and ‘no’ may be ‘maybe’

With them..

Why lies could easily be told but the truth remained the only thing that they could withhold
Or why days feel like weeks and weeks like eternity

Ever thought about what you might be missing out on
What experiences could have come, and how the life that you had was fun
Or what you could have accomplished all on your own

Ever dreaded the sleepless nights and difficult conversations
Always going round in circles searching for a flimsy form of justification
Or the things that you gave up knowing they would never do the same

Ever spelt out your mistakes and regrets..one letter after another
It’s gone and it’s passed but, you’d be damned if you stop dwelling
Or anticipated the end..better now than later

Right?

Love doesn’t live here,