How can I let this happen?

The wind in the willows whisper softly
Urging me to follow my heart
I take one step forward swiftly
But two steps back
It’s quiet, it’s dark
Full of uncertainties, a list of things that I cannot take back
Follow your heart they said
Let the words of love direct you in the right path
But how then can I let this happen?
When love is supposed to be the bright light at the end of the tunnel
Love, a combination of hope and happiness
Love, the absence of hate and regret
How then can I let this happen?
When the path that my heart has presented to me is incomplete
A thin line of rope suspended over a lake of fire
Narrow in it’s path, lovers are nothing but blatant liars
With a dark midst ever present in the surrounding
It’s hard to see, my vision is slowly diminishing
When the path leads me away from the love I was once used to
An inch away from the present,
one mile closer to the impermissible, unavailable, unforgettable
How then can I let this happen?
So I take a step back
And a few more
I’m now running a race in the opposite direction to the path that my heart has set out
Back in the arms of the previous
I can’t tell if I’m unwilling or dubious
Love still doesn’t live in this cold body of mine
But in the midst of all the confusion
I have learned to taste love with every sip that I take from each bottle of cheap wine
How could I have possibly let this happen?